In the mornings, there are usually about six people in the entire gym. It’s quiet. After a few weeks you even start recognising the regulars. There’s the old guy, whose routine involves changing his shirt in the weight room (bet you a dollar I’ve seen more elderly nipples than you today) and then balancing uneasily… Continue reading Note to self: never go to the gym after work
Month: August 2012
Blog launch party
Done. Twenty blog posts published. My self-imposed ban on waiting to tell people that this blog exists is over. I can now email the link to my mum, so that she can pretend that she reads it and I can pretend to believe her. I should definitely do some sort of… welcome. But what should… Continue reading Blog launch party
Practicing some self-restraint. Sorta.
I started this blog almost a month ago on what was surely one of the most anti-social but most enjoyable Saturday evenings I’ve had in a while. I sat down with this curry: and this movie: I put on the pink fluffy socks my grandma sent me for my birthday and cackled at my own… Continue reading Practicing some self-restraint. Sorta.
My Five Favourite Noises
Brick likes loud noises. But we're not here today to discuss volume, else this'd just be a list championing bands in student bars. We're here today to discuss those noises that give me a little shiver of delight, at any decibel. So, without further ado, here they are. The slide whistle. An instrument? That sounds… Continue reading My Five Favourite Noises
The Daily Hunk: Landon
When my flatmate went overseas a few months back, she left me in charge of her 'Daily Hunk' calendar - a daily man with a sleazy caption. She entrusted me to "take care" of her boys, ripping a new sheet off daily to see what colour nipple we'd be treated to. I "took care" of… Continue reading The Daily Hunk: Landon
Haiku Reviews of Public Bathrooms: Fringe Bar
Welcome to a series in which I review public bathrooms in haiku form. Previous editions: Fork & Brewer | Courtenay Place public toilets Fringe Bar, Wellington Door signs in Māori It’s a nice cultural touch In a Kiwi bar. When you get inside The wall of chlorine hits you Like a public pool. Space is… Continue reading Haiku Reviews of Public Bathrooms: Fringe Bar
I Am a Very Selfless Person
Back in the 1980s, when I was a baby, my mother saved my life. As I was the firstborn, she was new to motherhood, still doing everything properly. I would have been swathed in clean, hand-knitted blankets, free of vomit stains. I don’t have children, but from what I can work out, if you have… Continue reading I Am a Very Selfless Person
